Jun 15, 2010

What’s so great about a free press anyway?

Category: General

 The press is remorseless. Not satisfied with collaborating in the destruction of America by non-stop cheering for Box’o'Rocks piling on of debt, the insane spending, more taxes, destruction of the medical system, epidemic incompetence, Eric Holder, Janet No-brain-itano, kowtowing to thugs, apologizing for America…

you’d almost think that was enough to label the press the enemy. But this latest is even worse. They have now decided to dust off all those stories they’ve run periodically over the last generation, telling us how the game of soccer is finally ready to capture and intrigue all of America’s sports fans. How many times do we have to put up with this? Especially since it never happens.

Attention press! The United States speaking! We hate soccer. We will always hate soccer. The greatest thing about the world cup are those stupid horns that make it impossible to hear the announcers, whom you couldn’t understand anyway. As soon as the world cup is over, we will forget about it. We hate the game. Nobody in America wants to watch seven European dwarfs kick a ball back and forth for ninety minutes and then if someone on the other team should happen to fall down, there’s a goal and, wow, Malariaville beats Stupidstan by the rousing score of 1-0. (Or 1-nil as we euro-trash wannabes like to say.) I’d rather watch paint dry. So would anybody else who likes sports. Dear press, leave us alone.

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